behindcloseddoors | CLOSED ♔ but i won't cry for yesterday

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CLOSED ♔ but i won't cry for yesterday

WHO || Vi, Lucia, Wynn [Closed]
WHAT || Wynn speaks privately with Vi
WHERE || Knights HQ
WHEN || Sometime before the castle attack [backdated]
HOW || Actionspam. Single thread.

Lucia sleeps soundly, tiny lips puckered into a bow, one arm flung above her head in a rebel salute. It's those pockets of time that Vi allows herself to slip outside for a few moments of solitude, uninterrupted save for the steady hum of the baby monitor.

One night she returns to find Wynn standing in the doorway, staring into the room, eyes steady on the fragile and vulnerable new human, impossibly tiny and still so strong. She doesn't want to interrupt, but says softly, a knowing smile on her lips, "I do that too sometimes."

For the first 27 years of her life, her interest in babies was precisely zero. When a parent asked if she'd like to hold their baby, she would politely decline and then back away from the baby as if she'd encountered a pit scorpion in the woods. Something about babies made her deeply uncomfortable. They were little blobs of barely-human, unable to communicate in anything but gurgles, poops, and caterwauls.

And then Lucia happened.

She tears her eyes away from the daughter she had brought into this world, somehow safe and sound and vibrant and looks up at Wynn, tears welling in her eyes as the smile slips away. "I don't think I can do this anymore. Not right now."

Her tears cause his brow to furrow slightly, as he turns to regard her for a long, silent moment. She can feel his concern, but also his patience, and it's clear that he's waiting for her to go on, rather than attempting to prod her into further explanation.

He places one hand on her shoulder, the firm weight of his palm conveying his sympathy.

"I can't leave her." It's as simple as that. The idea of leaving her daughter, who she knows without any doubt or worry will be safe here in the castle, makes her chest seize up in panic.

Lucia was born with only one surviving parent, Vi can't turn her into an orphan without first being around long enough to convey just how wonderful of a person Luthir was. She's too young right now to take in all the stories that Vi tells her about her amazing father and her incredible uncle and the wonderful, wild woman who would have been her aunt; more stories about lost friends and family than the ones still living.

Her eyes drift back to the baby, oblivious to her mother's heartache. "Not while she's still so small."

"I understand," he says quietly, and it's apparent that he really does, that he doesn't blame her for her decision, and that it's, above all things, her right to decide.

It's heartening, that Wynn isn't condemning her choice, and it stems her tears, keeping them from spilling over as her eyes flutter shut for a beat.

"Are you disappointed?" She joined, after all, to fight, not man the Dragon's Light like a school nurse. Sitting out isn't following any of the tenants of the knighthood, she won't be fighting injustice and evil while nestled safe in the castle.

And while she realizes that her lifespan means she could be fighting for and alongside Wynn for centuries, she hasn't been alive long enough to learn how to think outside of the present. Everything for Violet is still right now, and she can't leave Lucia right now.

"How could I be?" He lowers his hand, but only so that he can look at her more fully. "Raising your child is no less heroic a task than any before the rest of us. Consider all she may grow to be." He smiles slightly. "You need only look at her mother and father to guess."

Her own returning smile is weak, but it's definitely a smile. Wynn's faith in her it tremendously important and the fact that he thinks being a mother is just as important as being a knight is so deeply uplifting.

"God, she's going to be such a nerd for nature," she remarks, tone light regardless of how down she still feels. "Thank you, Wynn, for everything you do for us. I can't imagine being able to raise her anywhere else. You were so important to Luthir and you're so important to me..."

She trails off, but it's clear she knows he'll be just as important to Lucia, effectively her grandfather, she just doesn't know how to phrase that without delving into feelings she's not sure he reciprocates. But Vi being Vi, she blurts it out anyway.

"You're like a father to me."

He certainly doesn't look taken aback or offput by the confession – on the contrary, his expression warms, and he places a hand on her shoulder. “Then you need not thank me, for doing what any father should willingly do for his young.”

Her heart flutters and her mouth turns up in a smile, faint but like sunshine in how happy that answer makes her, even as she quips, "Your young, you make us sound like your little baby silver dragons."

She glances up at him, squinting slightly. Fred Jr is descended from a dragon and he's Wynn's great-great-great-- no, that's impossible. But at the same time, why had it never occurred to her? Still, she unintentionally mirrors their very first conversation when she asks, "So, personal question, can I ask it?"

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Certainly. [ that's it that's the whole tag, this is why i jumped out of prose ]

How old are you? [ the question she really wants to ask needs some lead up and she's pretty sure this isn't going to turn into twilight. wynn is not seventeen. ]

I don't know, precisely.

So, basically... hella.

[ hella old. hella old. srs discussions with vi. ]

You're not an aasimar though, right?

No. [ his focus shifts to the little bb aasimar again with a slight smile. ] There's nothing divine about me.

Divinity is overrated. [ but lucia on the other hand is pretty awesome. ] The silver dragon in Freddie's family tree, do you happen to know them?

My family tree as well, considering we share one. [ he fixes her with a canny look ] But yes. Did you wish to know about them?

Yes. [ so firm, so steady, and then... word vomit. ] Shit, boss, is it you?

[ his lips curve up the slightest bit into a rather amused smile, as he turns to the door. ] I'd like to show Lucia something, if you don't mind. [ he pauses at the threshold ] I think it will give you the answers you seek.

Uh, yeah, anything, of course. [ there is literally no one she trusts more with her daughter. if she's honest, she trusts him more than she trusts herself. ]

Come along, then. [ bring the bb child! as he leads her to ye olde round table room ]

[ she scampers over to scoop up the sleeping baby who wakes up as vi settles her in her arms and makes a whiny noise like WHY MOM but vi shushes her gently. ] Promise it's important, Glowbug.

We'll certainly try not to keep her long. [ he opens the hallway, leads her past all those ominous prophetic images and into the round table room itself, where the great crystal dragon rises above them, and then keeps moving towards those large golden doors. ]

Hard to believe it wasn't even three years ago that I was in here telling you that you're super tall and intimidating like you weren't well aware. [ she has grown as a human being to be sure, but still hasn't figured out that brain to mouth filter. bouncing lu on her hip she keeps following him, eyes widening when she realizes he's not stopping. so bright though, she preemptively covers the baby's eyes. ]

Time has seemed to carry many changes on the winds since then, indeed.

[ pact sworn in blood - marc streitenfeld

the doors actually seem to open of their accord as they approach, and that dazzling golden light spills out, but luckily she's ready to cover the baby's eyes.

when her own eyes adjust and she turns back to the doors, she'd find them shutting again automatically behind them.

there's nothing inherently shocking in their initial surroundings, beside that remaining warm golden glow that falls across the walls and floors even here. they're merely in a fancy short hallway, a decorative table at the point where it comes to an end ahead, but the hall branches into a T there, and wynn continues on, turning left at the fork.

if she glances to the right, she'd see that the right hand passage leads down towards a wide-set pair of columns that appear to open into a large well lit circular room, though it seems entirely void of any furnishings from the angle visible.

the glow, however, originates from the direction Wynn took to the left, and the sight that meets her eyes there would be enough to stop anyone in their tracks.

it feels as if the room opens into yet another world, a world composed entirely of gold, but that's merely because the overall effect is so dramatic. the ceiling rises just as high as the dragon statue does in the round table room, making it clear this room extends through both floors of the castle, and it is lit by the warm flickering light of numerous candelabras on tall stands. gathered in innumerable piles on the floor is a veritable sea of loose coins, dotted with golden artifacts, jewels, gems, shields, pieces of armor, weapons, staffs, tapestries, sculptures, scepters, pillars, tomes, and who knows what more. the coins seem structured in various mounds at first, that look deceptively like small hills or more morbidly, burial mounds, but it becomes clear upon looking a moment longer that it is because they are sloped around a large depression in the center, that has to be at least 120 feet in diameter.

wynn stands a few feet inside the room, his expression obscured, hands locked behind his back once more.

he says nothing, waiting for them to enter, and perhaps, to respond. ]

[ for the first time in her entire twenty eight years on earth, vi is completely speechless. her mouth opens and closes a few times in valiant effort to acknowledge what she's seeing, but the only thing that escapes is a shrill noise of complete and utter bafflement. her eyes, already a kaleidoscope of color widen at the sight and seem to collect some of the golden light as it washes over her, the same glow turning lucia into a glistening little golden pumpkin, reflecting back from her bright green eyes in much the same manner.

she says nothing for a long, long while, only prompted to speak when lucia does it for her, bleating happily and flailing her arms toward wynn. even then all violet can manage is a shocked, ] Oh my god.

[ his eyes glint with pure amusement as he looks back at her when she makes that remark, and they study lucia for a moment before he says simply: ]

Now, Lucia. Do not be afraid.

[ his words are soothing, and then he turns again and walks forward over the piles, with uncannily sure footing, the coins clinking and crunching beneath his boots. As he reaches the crest of one mound, he tilts his head up to gaze at the distant window fixed in the ceiling. A strange scent pervades the room, not entirely unpleasant.†

wynn looks back at them once again, and this time his eyes have changed entirely. instead of being dark, they appear to be composed of pure mercury, void of any pupil, and they seem to flash with a sudden sheen when the light catches them. and then, with an abruptness that's nearly startling, he is expanding, changing. wynn's features don't seem to even contort, just vanish to reveal others, as if someone were rubbing away one image painted over another, much larger image.

the first striking features to reveal themselves are an enormous expanse of glistening scales, each barely distinguishable from the ones beside it, giving the appearance of a creature sculpted out of pure metal. the head that rears up on the long neck is crested by a dramatic metallic silver frill, supported by black tipped spines, that flows down the creature's head and neck. similar ear frills fan out from below two long, smooth silver horns, tipped in black. its nose is beaklike, and no teeth visibly protrude from its closed mouth, while a frill dangles from its chin that looks strikingly like a miniature goatee. an especially shiny and tough looking plate covers the front of its face, blending into its beak.

as it rears to a standing position, the creature comes to tower at a height almost four times that of the man, two long silver wings with darkened edges unfolding and stretching to a span of one hundred and fifty feet, before folding back at his sides.

the dragon nestles regally atop the pile, fixing its gaze - the same bizarre, intimidating, wise gaze he had as a human - upon the two now far below him. it seems to be waiting, patiently, for her to speak, and makes no motion to move from its perch.

† Wis check of 14 to note the smell as that of fresh rainfall ]

Oh my god.

[ funny how it's not the gold that draws vi forward, but the dragon. the sort of thing most people run from, vi walks right up to. at least up the the edge of the gold, tipping her head back to look up at him, the picture of awestruck surprise as she takes a deep breath of a faint reminder of spring showers. (wis 17)

god, he's beautiful.

lucia fusses in her arms, but not from fear, tiny hand reaching out to the spot the figure of wynn once was, forehead crinkled in confusion. finally, finally, vi finds herself capable of more than just shocked lizzie maguire noises and manages to sooth her daughter. ]

Oh sweetie, I promise he hasn't gone anywhere. [ she smooths back lucia's downy soft curls and uses the same little hand that was reaching for wynn to point up at the towering dragon in front of them. ] That is Wynn, Lucia. Remember this moment, Glowbug, because this is the first time you've really met your grandfather.

[ she follows the line of her daughter's arm to address wynn herself, finally, focus entirely captured the sight before her. (spot 29) ] I always thought we were more your knights than knights of some inexplicable dragon figurehead, I never would have imagined they were one and the same.

[ vi had joined for the ideals and the tenants of the knighthood, ones she wasn't entirely sure she even possessed at the time, but she stayed because of wynn. she fought for wynn, she put her faith in wynn and he had never steered her wrong, even with all the tumult in her life and all the tragedy she kept finding piled at her feet, all the loss she kept experiencing. wynn was like a beacon of hope. she knew he wasn't infallible, she did her best not to put him on a pedestal because everyone makes mistakes and should be allowed to do so...

but like she would have done with luthir, vi would follow wynn anywhere because she believed in him so fully, so wholeheartedly. and now it turns out the man she'd pledged her loyalty was the same silver dragon she'd pledged her bow to and abruptly she has to press her lips together to quell the swell of emotions that threatens to bowl her over. ]

Did Luthir know?

[ The creatures dips its large head in what seems to be a nod. And then speaks, in a voice that sounds much like Wynn's human voice deepened and set on reverb against the acoustics in this chamber. ] There have, in the past, been circumstances that have required me to take my true form outside these walls. And those who have served our cause through the ebbing of the eldritch tide have often learned, because I find myself unable to polymorph without the aid of magic. [ The initial shock passed, she can make out more details of his appearance, each noting what appears to be something of a scar on the dragon's left flank. It looks like a very large scale is missing, though the wound looks very old. ] And, of course, those who have done me great service, my section heads, my Dragon's Claws, and other seasoned Knights are entrusted with this knowledge.

And those who I believe worthy of protecting my secret.

[ she feels neither seasoned nor worthy enough to protect this, but she'd kept lazarus a secret for six months -- from elena and myri and finnick -- and she would have continued to do so for centuries if she had to so she knows that she is capable of it, she will just never feel worthy of it. ]

Does that mean you're stuck as a dragon when the veil closes. [ she pauses, considering her words. ] I just said stuck as a dragon like that is a bad thing and not the coolest thing in the, oh my god, I just flashed back to that time I told Koraith and my husband I punched a dragon, I'm so sorry, he was legitimately trying to eat me, I swear I'm not racist against dragons I'm just morally opposed to being eaten by pretty much anything.

[ oh my god. ] I should stop talking now.

[ is the dragon smiling somehow

maybe. ]

It depends on what form I am in when the Veil seals. But it has happened many times before, yes. During those times, the chain of command I have established is essential, as the Dragon's Claws preside together in my stead, conveying my orders for me.

[ brain running a mile a minute, vi tries to start a handful of sentences before cutting herself off as another question occurs to her.

why gold? what will happen to her and lucia when the veil closes? (she can be curious and self-obsessed at the same time.) does he enjoy swimming in gold like scrooge mcduck and if so how often does he do it and if not does he feel that it's a damaging and unkind stereotype against dragons? how does he really feel about smaug? what happened to his back? is he going to select a second dragon's claw because if he doesn't and the veil closes, like, tomorrow then jack will be stuck doing it all on his own and that's not very fair is it? what was she like, the woman that tamed him, so to speak, and started the line that fred is a part of? does fred know? does he breath fire? omigosh, can he fly?

her eyes light up at that last thought, absurdly however, it's not what she finally settles on, instead opting to ask, ] Why does it smell like petrichor?

Edited 2015-12-04 01:00 (UTC)

The natural scent of my kind.

How come you don't smell like that all the time? [ a beat as lucia fusses and vi shifts her to cradle her in her arms instead of tucked against her hip. ] I guess you might and I'm just not close enough to sniff you because that's super weird, but now you're gigantic and there is more to smell.

[ since she's answered her own question, at least enough that she doesn't really care about the real answer, she moves on to the next one. ] What if the veil closes soon, though? Jack'll be all alone.

Selecting a new Dragon's Claw is not a process I ever rush, given that the appointments are for life, and place considerable pressures and dangers on the chosen Knight.

Believe me, that it is something I have been turning over in my mind.

Oh, no, don't get me wrong, I totally trust you and I'm just curious and no one is around to hear me babble so I figured I wouldn't waste the opportunity to talk to my dragon boss who is a dragon.

[ in case he hadn't noticed, he's a dragon. DRAGON. ]

Not sure who could live up to Thomas' legacy anyway.

What is important is that I do not seek to replace it. Our next Dragon's Claw, I imagine, will be very different from his or her predecessor.

[ lucia fusses again and vi shifts her once more to feed her, completely at ease, though her expression turns thoughtful and a little sad. ] Does it ever get easier? Losing everyone?

[ the dragon dips its head a bit, gold coins rolling away from it as it shifts. ] Easier is not the word I would use. But you begin to have perspective on the time you do have with those you value.

Luthir said once that because elves live so long their passions and relationships tend to be long term, but I can't seem to hold on to anything. I love everything I have and everything I had with him, but it was so... fleeting. I don't wanna look back one day hundreds of years from now and have it feel like a second when he's my whole life.

What I believe Luthir meant by this is that our emotions run longer - that we value those relationships, and sustain those passions far longer.

So even if what we had was ephemeral, how I feel is... eternal? [ she can live with that. she was always going to love luthir forever and that is enough of a comfort that she won't lose that feeling. she is terrified of the day she wakes up and he's not the first thing she thinks of, but maybe it won't be for a while. she can cross that bridge when she comes to it. ]

Is that why you've stayed here for... however long the Knights have been the Knights?

In part. I also happen to believe in the cause that we stand for, and that it is a battle that will never be truly won.

But that doesn't mean we should ever stop fighting it.

We can't. Evil, regrettably, will always be around. New and exciting different kinds of evil that we haven't encountered yet, evil-lite and evil gods. The curse of acting on the side of good is that we always have to keep fighting. Evil only has to do one thing and they can be done, but we can't stop because if we do, they win. [ she looks down at lucia, chest tightening with love and grief and pride that this life is one she might one day lead, just like her parents. ] Continuing to not stand idly by is what is important, otherwise they've already won, but if even one person stands up and says no, they haven't won yet. I, for one, refuse to let them win. I'm stubborn like that. [ she made a mistake once in almost giving in to blade completely, she's not going to make that mistake again. ]

Then you understand, why I would see this Knighthood stand.

Of course I do. And I don't think there is a thing that anyone could do to stop that. We stay because we believe in doing the right thing, regardless of personal consequence. You choose people who will keep fighting, and we chose you for the same reason, boss.

In every era, there have been numerous souls willing to join that fight, knowing fully well what it asks of them. I've been very lucky to have so many flock to my banner.

I don't think that's luck, boss. You put good into the world, of course good and... dubious shades of good will come back to you. [ christos, archer, herself. they're not all paragon's of good, but they do good things and that is just as important. ]

Sometimes all good requires to grow is the faith in someone to do good to begin with.

It is why I try to encourage Archer to make good choices. [ also, you know, vi actually like archer. ]

Precisely, yes.

Does this answer your question satisfactorily?

Satisfactorily is a word, yeah. [ she shifts lucia, smiling a little sheepishly. ] This is... it's all incredible, boss. Like, mindbogglingly incredible, I feel appropriately boggled.

[ i mean. he's a fucking dragon. her boss is a dragon. she's talking to a dragon. ]

But I should probably get our little Glowbug back to sleep before she decides this is her treasure, too.

Very well. Good night then, Sir Reedhym. Lucia. [ and he shifts to curl down into himself like a big cat on his pile of gold tbh ]

[ omg that's the cutest thing she's ever seen. can you apply cute to a fucking dragon?????? who knows. but it's darling.

she pauses like she wants to say thank you, that he trusted her enough to reveal this, that he's always been so kind of her and lucia, that he'd opened his home for her tiny family, but she's so struck by the sight of him completely at ease, she stays silent, watching a moment longer before she turns to leave.

she finally murmurs, as she opens the main doors, ] Night, boss.

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CLOSED ♔ but i won't cry for yesterday

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